FASHR: "I feel like I am way too inconsistent right now"

Following their comfortable victory over ENCE, Dion "FASHR" Derksen of Fnatic sat down with Ryan Friend of Dust2.us. During their chat, the two discussed various topics such as the Dutchman's jump to the tier-one scene, his time in ECSTATIC and how that helped him grow as a player, and the type of environment there is inside his current team.

2-1. It's been an improvement from where you guys were at the first stage and it definitely feels like a more comfortable position. Overall, how have you felt about Fnatic's game plan coming out of Challengers and now into what should be, harder competition?

I think, as you can see, we were really inconsistent and it was mostly from our T-sides where we couldn't find the mid-round calls and it was just bad overall. Let's just say it was super bad. We had a great talk yesterday again because the showing against Heroic which was, on this stage, unacceptable from all of us. There wasn't anyone playing good and I think we had a really good talk.

Like I mentioned in interviews before, we are all really open and we can all say like "step the fuck up" and no one gets mad. I think you could see it today that we had a really good game plan, I think the coach did a good job on it. Everyone was hitting shots as well even though we are not feeling that well because of the long days, like having the last game yesterday, then the second game today. It's really tough mentally and physically but we managed to get the win against ENCE in the end.

That is one of the hard things about these Majors that it is so condensed into these two weeks, especially for you guys coming from the Challengers Stage where you went all four days with five games. Now you're going to be in the BO3's so it's going to be an extended long time, how has it really worn on you and do you feel like you're not up to your same game that you would be if you just came in at the Legends stage?

I'm not really sure about that because the first week in the Challengers stage we all had issues with jetlag and waking up at 4am and now we have normal sleeping schedules and I think the Legends teams experience the jetlag now. They probably get worse sleep than we do now, so I think in that scenario we have an advantage, and only against Heroic yesterday it didn't show. I think in general we are well rested even though we don't get the best amount of sleep but we just have to accept that that's it, that's esports. No time to breathe.

It's funny when you talk about jetlag because I think for the first time the Americas teams don't have that so do you feel that those Americas teams that are performing a little bit better like Liquid and FURIA, do you think that actually contributes towards it?

Yeah it might have. I think the European teams are not really used to jetlag since all the tournaments are in Europe. It's maybe two hours ahead, or two hours behind so it's not that much. This was the first time for me that I experienced jetlag while playing so it was new for me. On the day that we arrived we arrived at nine or something and then I went to bed at one, but then I woke up at four so it's super hard.

There is also an interesting thing that many people are talking about, the Challenger team buff. Everyone is ready and used to it so they're able to get these upsets against some big teams. MOUZ has been impressive since they just beat Vitality, do you think that being here earlier and playing consistently allows you to have an edge over more superior teams?

Yeah I think so. Right now, we are pretty used to everything. We know the way, the setups. We know everything and the issues we unfortunately had, we are familiar with it. We played two BO1's and three BO3's in the Challengers stage so we are really set and ready for the Legends stage.

This team has been an amalgamation of parts. There has been so many different people coming from different places and now you have had a few months together to embed things in. Do you still feel like you are constantly learning more about one another or do you feel like you're on the road to hitting your apex?

We are constantly learning more about one another, especially me since this is my first time with tier-one experience and I think you can see it in some games. I have a lot to learn especially with the communication and they're all helping me with it. They're being straightforward with it and that's what I like and I told them that they can say literally anything to me, even in-game, even if we are losing 5-0 and you think I made four mistakes the last four rounds, just tell me. I can only play better from that and I think I can say it to everyone else so I think that's a great atmosphere because everyone is learning and wanting to get to the playoffs and you can only do that together.

For you, you're 26 years old and as you said this is your first time in tier one. Do you think that ability to take such criticism and knowing "this is my first time here", but at the same time you have the wisdom of doing this for so long that you're maybe able to do it better than some younger players who might be more hot-headed?

Yeah 100%. I think we are all really mature in our team, and I think you can feel that in the after talks as well. Like I mentioned, we are straightforward and I think if you had an 18 year old who thinks he is really insane but has a lot of learning it could be a little bit tricky. I think I have a lot of great teammates and I couldn't wish for anything better.

One of those teammates is mezii who is new to the IGL role, but now he has really been around the block. He was at GamerLegion, the Cloud9 experiment and now he's ended up here on Fnatic and he's the IGL. How do you feel that his calls have been and how do you feel that he's developed as a leader within the team?

Yeah you can see the line going straight up for him and I think he is improving a lot but sometimes for example against Heroic it was a little bit quiet. It's obviously not all him, it's everyone that can come up with ideas like in the game against ENCE today, everyone came up with ideas that you can instantly see how good we can play. I think we need to keep that up because he cannot do it alone, he needs all of us to help him.

Talk to me a little bit about KRIMZ. What is it like playing with a legend of the game who has been around for so long and this is your first time at the top? Were you a little star struck at first or was it easy to get into the game with him?

It's kind of a fun story because when I started playing Counter-Strike, when I bought it first it was 2014 and I watched a Twitch stream and I saw the third map of the IEM Cologne final between Fnatic and NIP and KRIMZ was playing, and now I am his teammate. You have that legend and you go in the server with them, but he's a pretty chill guy and I think I've learned a lot from him. He's pretty straightforward to me and like I said, that's the way I like it. If you walk around here all the fans are like "Oh KRIMZ! picture, picture, picture!" and they don't care about us, they want KRIMZ. laughing

Does that hurt you a little bit? laughing

No that doesn't matter at all. There are no fans who want pictures with us as well but it's still amazing. Obviously, the guy is a legend, he won two Majors and I wish that I can win one someday.

The fans here are loud. They're all crazy and they're all calling for people's names. Has that intimidated you at all since you haven't been at many events like this or are you using it as motivation?

At first, I didn't really want to go to any events because I just wanted to play there, but the Major in Antwerp was like two hours from my home so I thought "I kind of have to go there". There I had the experience so it gave me a motivational boost like "I want to play in this arena" and now I qualified for the Rio Major, one game away from playing in the arena so it is amazing. We haven't played in front of a crowd that was too loud yet since we kept having the last game so people left after FURIA. It was a little bit calmer but if you saw the game FURIA vs Spirit, I hope I can play in front of that kind of crowd in the arena.

The arena is going to be really big, around 18,000 people and things will be in center stage. How do you feel in terms of as an event space, where would Brazil rank up with everywhere else?

Honestly, I think they should have a Major every year. If the sport is going to be like this, then they should have one of the Majors in Brazil every year. The atmosphere, and the songs are really catchy and when you are setting up your PC you are dancing a little bit and getting into the vibe, in the mood and getting hyped. I think it's amazing and I think the crowd in Antwerp, I only went to the Final so I can't really say how the other quarter-finals and semi-finals were like but I think it was nice, but more like a normal crowd. These guys are just crazy, but crazy in a good way.

When you did go to the Major final, you were part of ECSTATIC. Talk to me about your time in ECSTATIC since they are one of the lower, more development teams within the Danish region. How was that helpful toward your own career development and did you feel that has put you into the prime position to be on Fnatic, or do you think you still had a lot to learn when you joined Fnatic?

I think both. I came from the Benelux scene and besides ChrisJ and maybe CRUC1AL, there is no real players so there is no one to learn from. When I joined Lyngby back then, it was a huge experience for me to play with birdfromsky, I thought "this guy is the smartest guy in the world" because I had never experienced something like that. The first few months I had a little bit of trouble, then they kicked me out and then one and a half months later birdfromsky DM'd me saying "Please can you come back" then I came back and I got the star roles.

I performed like an animal and I learned so much from him. I got so much freedom and he was straightforward as well and he told me "ok you got this 2k, but I don't want you to do that again because we can't follow you up". You open your eyes for it, and I learned a lot from birdfromsky, he's a great guy as well. He was accused of cheating but 100% he's not cheating guys, he's not cheating. Yeah, I learned a lot from him and without him, I think I wouldn't have played in Fnatic. I had to change a lot of roles in Fnatic since roeJ got the star roles, but if I didn't have the experience from ECSTATIC and the knowledge from birdfromsky, I wouldn't have even got a shot at this spot in Fnatic, in a legendary org.

So you're not taking anything for granted right now on Fnatic?

No, no, no. I think I am the player with the most to learn since I have new roles and I am more taking space now myself and I need to communicate more for example if they have a close ramp setup on Mirage, saying "we should do this and this" where I am not really used to it so I am not really doing it that much. They keep reminding me, the coach as well. Practice makes perfect, I just need more time to develop into a really good player.

Even despite your age of 26, where many have retired and had entire careers before that age, so where do you feel that the apex of your career is going to come, or do you think it's now and you're hitting your stride with Fnatic now as, like you said, you're one BO3 from qualifying for the Major playoffs.

I think I can become way better. I'm 26 but I started playing CS when I was 20 so, I don't have the 1.6 or Source experience but I feel I kind of look young as well. I turn 27 in January but you wouldn't be able to tell. I think my mind is strong enough to learn more and with the help of everyone in the team, I can become better and better. I am doing my best at home to watch demos, DM and everything you want to do to get better at the new positions that I have.

How do you think that you have filled into that so, are you on track with your career progression where you want to be?

No. I feel like I am way too inconsistent right now and I think the Major has shown that. I need to step the fuck up and I did it this game, but I need to do it tomorrow as well. I need to keep delivering because it's not that I am playing bad spots, I still have good spots so I need to have the impact. I am not satisfied with myself because I know how could I can be especially in ECSTATIC back then even though we didn't really play tier-one teams much, but I think I showed the potential I had, and I think it's not really come out yet in Fnatic and I need to work harder.